Nobody told Manley!

As you are no doubt aware, I am a keen campanologist. Yesterday we went 'quadding' for Benji's 30th. This was considerably better than I was expecting.

After a short run around a loop, with officials slowing me down on every bend and downslope, during which time my heart plummeted in the sad knowledge that this would be dull, we then went on 'safari'.

We lined up in a vague order of competence, which mostly involved 'who got there first' and set off. It was fun skidding on the gravel (I had no brakes at all) but it was flat and fairly boring for the first half mile or so, but the I found the first drop, only about a foot, but still big enough to make my loin tender upon landing, and then we were into the woods.

From there on in it was roots and berms, drops and jumps, puddles and streams and joy.

The chap in front of me, a speleologist named Glen, rode headlong into a tree, went out over the bars, and had to be removed across the back of an instructors quad, head streaming blood where he had hit another tree whilst in flight.

It all ended too soon and we had an organised competition where, thanks to penalty points, I managed to lose by around 15 minutes (I sort of cheated a little, you see) ad then we went for dinner at the Dinosaur Café.

I weigh 194.1lbs.

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I am having a poo
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191.7lbs. I may still be a little overweight, but Benji is now OLD!

Here are the Muppets' three most gifted singers.